janto_teagirl: (Vikings Lord's Prayer)
[personal profile] janto_teagirl
I'm sorry i haven't posted an update about the job interview, it's just alot happend after that.

To start off, it would appear I didn't get the job. I was told by the interviewer that I would receive an email later that night or Friday if I got the job. I never did. But like I said, it's ok, I get to go on vacation. The hotel was booked months ago and this vacation was planned since March. So i was happy I get to go.

Now I was going to post that Saturday, June 11, but having been out  of town and getting home exhausted, I thought " I'll post that tomorrow". Well, you know what happend Sunday. I felt that posting about a possible job just hours after such a great loss of life and the events before and after would be disrespectful.

So I waited a week, only to get my period. Spent like three days in bed and in pain.

Sunday, June 19, my periond ends and because i'm busy that morining and afternoon and won't get home till after 6pm (I'm at a someone's house with 20 other people) , I figure i'll just post it that night. Around 5pm I get a text from my sister that actor Anton Yelchin has died. I don't believe it at first (thinking it's a hoax) so i google it. It was true. I had a hard time keeping it together at that moment. His death hit me hard because A) how young he was B) how he died and C) the fact that he was in a series that I liked 'Star Trek'.  For days after his death, even now, there is this overwhelming sadness and guilt. Sadness because he was an only child, how much his parents loved him, and how in pain he must have felt. For the guilt I can't explain. I was nowhere near California when he died ( I live in FL), I was asleep when it happened. Maybe it's because i didn't pray hard enough? Either way i'm trying to work through these feelings but this month has been crazy and it's just left me emotionally drained.

I hope and pray that next month will be better.  

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